Don't try to pass along that train pass

Tuesday my son stepped on the train and used my husband's monthly Metra pass to ride into the city without aggravation.
I can't say I have had the same luck.
Who would have thought a monthly Metra pass would not be gender neutral?
Who would have thought it mattered whether a male or female butt took up a seat?
In the words of one of my dear friends "why does it matter whose (expletive) butt is in the seat if you have a monthly pass?"
"You can't use this pass,'' the conductor informed me last month when I attempted to meet my husband in the city.
"What?" I said, a bit embarrassed to be called out in front of peers in the quiet car. "You are female and the pass is marked male.
"$6.25 please."
I scrambled for change in my wallet and a little dignity.
My husband, who drove into the loop that day so we could drive home together after dinner, had given me his pass to "use" his Metra seat.
A nouveau-commuter, he had not noticed the M and F boxes at the top of the monthly pass. The M had been marked, with an X, with a permanent marker. My husband also had not noticed --as did I -- or chose to ignore -- as did I -- that the pass is not transferable. 
Ten-day passes were always good for that purpose.
Unless you are a same-sex couple, or son of a father, or mother of a daughter, etc., a picky conductor is going to cramp your flexibility.
There is no photograph of the commuter or finger print to guarantee the monthly pass is not transferable. Just an M and a F and in this case a big X on the corner.
It does not matter how many times service is interrupted or discontinued due to weather during the ticket's tenure. It does not matter that you purchased ridership for 60-61 passages and you only really used 40 if you are consistently riding five times a week.
It did not matter that my husband did not ride into the loop the day he let me ride in.
It matters where the check is marked on the M or F space.
Of course if you purchase the monthly pass from a non-gender-discriminating machine instead of a ticket agent, or thru your company's Flex-Payroll program, it is not marked at all.
So earlier this month, with my husband's new unmarked-monthly pass in my pocket, I was going to attempt to use it and meet him in the loop.
I was surprised to see the same conductor approach me for my fare. I was afraid -- because I am a rule follower -- to hand her the unmarked pass. I was also afraid she would recognize me and confiscate my husband's $160 pass, or worse mark the F with permanent marker so he would have trouble using it the balance of the month. 
I had my unfair fare, ready, in my sweaty palm.
"$5.75" she said, not making eye contact.
"Oh?" I said, thinking last time the same train, same time cost me more.
"$5.75"
I did not know if she was pegging me for a senior fare or if I had just experienced one of the reasons the rail line, which is still WIFIless in 2014 (a whole other blog), is in financial distress.
INCONSISTENCY, not people riding on other people's monthly passes.
I justified my not arguing up the fare with her by justifying in my head that the seat I was sitting in had already been paid for.
More than once.